As a psychologist, I help many people improve on their communication. In an ideal world, we would all learn early on that open, reciprocal communication is far more productive than trying to stake claims without considering others’ perspectives. Diplomacy is a valuable skill that can be applied to all areas of life. In the home, the ability to engage in thoughtful communication can strengthen connections and resolve conflicts (partner or other family members). The goal for counsellings is to help sharpen the skills that you have so you can communicate better and more effectively.
If you don’t know how to express your needs, they’re less likely to be met. Fortunately, improving your communication skills is always possible and its my goal to teach you how to do that. It involves mastering the art of active listening, a skill taught in nearly every psychologist. counseling program.
How do we stop the bad communication habits?
I aim to help you identify issues that may influence the dysfunctional communication you and your partner experience. Together, we will work with you to develop treatment goals and ensure you are on the right path to success. We do this by monitoring progress session-by-session and providing guidance every step of the way. Sometimes, it's really difficult to figure out what you are doing, which may make the communication worse or troubling. Gathering information from others is a particularly useful strategy to learn more about your hangups. Whatever you do, do not take the hangups personally, Much of what we learn about how to communicate come from what we have observed from others. The people that we have observed throughout our lives may not have been the best communicators themselves. Part of the counselling process is to simply observe, model and learn how to communicate in a healthy manner. Part of this process is to also learn when to have these conversations and how to monitor your body to see if you are getting too upset or angry.
I an assessment necessary when it comes to communication issues?
There are psychological related concerns that may influence poor communication with others. Part of the process is to conduct an assessment to better understand if there are physical or emotional concerns that may influence poor communication. For instance, many people who struggle with communication also struggle with symptoms of ADHD. This could be a rather simple fix by suggesting behavioural strategies or more investigative work is required to determine best course of action. Either way, having a better understanding of yourself may help improve not only what happens at home but outside of home as well.
What does healthy communication look like?
Healthy communication requires there to be attention. This means that you are not on your cell phone and you are engaged in the conversation. You are hearing their concerns and are able to repeat them back to them in your own words. Healthy communication also requires that you acknowledge their feelings and validate their concerns. What's also required, in my opinion, is openness, compassion, and kindness. One trick that I often use with my couple is to make sure they try to explain the problem without using a 'you' statement (i.e., when you..). The goal of counselling is to help you better understand the rules of engagement and how best to remain attentive and communicate your needs.
There are so many variables that may influence poor communication. Sometimes, it's a lack of time, energy, or desire. Part of the assessment is to help figure out it and develop a plan so that both of you are on the right track.
Books you may find helpful:
Getting the Love You Want - Harvill Hendrix
Emotional Alchemy: How the Mind Can Heal the Hearth - Tara Bennet Goleman
Love Sense - Sue Johnson
Additional Articles:
Working with Unsolvable Problems
I an assessment necessary when it comes to communication issues?
There are psychological related concerns that may influence poor communication with others. Part of the process is to conduct an assessment to better understand if there are physical or emotional concerns that may influence poor communication. For instance, many people who struggle with communication also struggle with symptoms of ADHD. This could be a rather simple fix by suggesting behavioural strategies or more investigative work is required to determine best course of action. Either way, having a better understanding of yourself may help improve not only what happens at home but outside of home as well.
What does healthy communication look like?
Healthy communication requires there to be attention. This means that you are not on your cell phone and you are engaged in the conversation. You are hearing their concerns and are able to repeat them back to them in your own words. Healthy communication also requires that you acknowledge their feelings and validate their concerns. What's also required, in my opinion, is openness, compassion, and kindness. One trick that I often use with my couple is to make sure they try to explain the problem without using a 'you' statement (i.e., when you..). The goal of counselling is to help you better understand the rules of engagement and how best to remain attentive and communicate your needs.
There are so many variables that may influence poor communication. Sometimes, it's a lack of time, energy, or desire. Part of the assessment is to help figure out it and develop a plan so that both of you are on the right track.
Books you may find helpful:
Getting the Love You Want - Harvill Hendrix
Emotional Alchemy: How the Mind Can Heal the Hearth - Tara Bennet Goleman
Love Sense - Sue Johnson
Additional Articles:
Working with Unsolvable Problems
