Dating Again After a Breakup or Divorce: Managing Anxiety and Negative Thinking
It is very common to feel anxious, uncertain, or self-doubting when beginning to date again after a breakup or divorce. As a registered clinical psychologist, I work with many individuals who describe feeling worried, insecure, unwanted, or fearful of being hurt again.
In counselling, we often normalize these reactions. Feeling anxious when re-entering the dating world is not a sign that something is wrong—it is a natural response to vulnerability and past emotional experiences.
Winter Insomnia: Sleep Difficulties During the Fall and Winter Months
The term winter insomnia is not a formal clinical diagnosis, but it is a useful way to describe sleep difficulties that emerge or worsen during the fall and winter months. I first encountered the concept through research examining seasonal sleep changes, including studies on hibernation patterns and reduced daylight exposure.
Many individuals notice changes in sleep quality during winter, including difficulty falling asleep, frequent night awakenings, early morning waking, or restless, non-restorative sleep. These symptoms often overlap with seasonal affective disorder (SAD) and can significantly affect mood, energy, and daily functioning.
How you speak to yourself about your body plays a powerful role in your mental health, self-esteem, and overall wellbeing. Negative or critical self-talk can gradually erode confidence, increase anxiety, and shape how you relate to yourself and others. For individuals and families in Vaughan and York Region, these concerns are common and highly treatable.
This process can be explored independently, but many people find it helpful to work with a psychologist through psychotherapy. Improving body image is not simply about avoiding negative self-talk; it often involves unlearning critical patterns and relearning more compassionate ways of relating to yourself. For many individuals, this takes time and consistent practice.
Why body-related self-talk matters
Taking a step back to notice what you say about your body—and how you say it—is an important part of this work. Comments about weight, dieting, or appearance can influence how others perceive you and, more importantly, how you perceive yourself.
This is particularly important for parents and caregivers. Children often absorb and internalize messages they hear about bodies, food, and self-worth. Over time, these messages can influence their beliefs, emotional wellbeing, and relationship with their own bodies.
One helpful shift is moving away from labeling foods as “good” or “bad.” Using more neutral language—such as “anytime foods” or “occasional foods”—can reduce shame and promote a healthier, more balanced approach to eating.
The impact of comparison on body image
Comparing yourself to others can significantly affect confidence, mood, and stress levels. When comparison becomes habitual, it often reinforces dissatisfaction and self-criticism. Children may also notice this behaviour and learn to measure their own worth against others.
Reducing comparison is not about ignoring reality—it is about letting go of a habit that offers little benefit and often increases emotional distress. Learning to disengage from comparison can help reduce daily stress and support healthier self-esteem for both adults and children.
Empowerment, confidence, and self-worth
Finding ways to empower yourself and your children plays an important role in maintaining healthy self-esteem. This may involve developing interests, hobbies, or extracurricular activities that build a sense of competence, enjoyment, and identity beyond appearance.
In my work as a psychologist, I have seen how engaging in meaningful activities—at any age—can strengthen confidence, improve mood, and support a more balanced sense of self. These strategies are often integrated into therapy for anxiety, low self-esteem, and perfectionism.
