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Goal setting is an important strategy that should be discussed weekly for all couples. This gives an opportunity to discuss what is working and not working when it comes to managing the responsibilities and nourishing the relationship. Discussing the goals for the week can help make clear what needs fixing and why. It also helps each person in the relationship become clear of their role or new role and how they can contribute actively to cooperate with changes that need to be made.

When it comes to couples counselling, the weekly sit-down meetings give them an opportunity to practice what was modelled in the session. For those not in couples counselling the meetings present as an opportunity to discuss literature on how to improve their relationship, for instance they can reflect on Jon Gottman's Seven Principles of Making a Marriage Work or the Four Horsemen. The meetings can help them both understand their role in dysfunctional behaviours and what they each need to do to help bring more support to the relationship.

There are two rules that need to be followed when working with goal setting at these meetings: specify what exactly each partner needs to do to repair the relationship or continue to nourish the relationship, and provide an opportunity for each partner to show their commitment to support the relationship. Reflect on what you need for the week and consult with your partner. The goal should be geared towards helping you improve the quality of your relationship. Ask your partner how they can help you accomplish this goal. If you are the partner supporting the goal, please be as responsive to exactly what your partner needs to commit to achieving the goal. Remember to be considerate, accept imperfection, commit to change, focus on problem-solving, and work on a compromise.

If you need support, please feel free to contact me. I support connection with any Clinical Psychologist. I practice psychological counselling and provide psychotherapy services. My office is located in Vaughan, Ontario.