Breakups/Divorce is a process that usually affects a number of individuals – all families involved and network members. Similar to other separations, this dynamic and complex transition has a beginning and end. Whenever an individual exits a relationship they are likely to experience emotions such as sadness, anger, confusion, and grief (regardless of them being the recipient of a breakup or the one ending it). These overwhelming feelings may interfere with their lives and make it difficult for them to function in everyday activities (work, school, etc.). Therapy for breakups and separations can help improve self-esteem and prevent depression and post-traumatic stress disorder. Therapy focusing on divorce and breakups are designed to help individuals achieve satisfactory post breakup adjustment. Studies suggest that divorced/separated individuals are more likely to socially isolate themselves than individuals of intact families (Weinraub and Wolf 1983). Also, recently separated individuals are also more likely to increase the amount of hours they work and spend less time developing and strengthening their social support systems (seeking new friends and strengthening their family relations).
Children of divorced individuals are also significantly impacted by the adjustment. Therapy can help parents understand how best to support their children during this delicate time of change. According to Sholevar’s text, Textbook of Family and Couples Therapy: Clinical Applications, “insecurely attached children of divorce/separation experience more peer difficulties, are more dependent on their teachers, and exhibit more anxious/resistant and anxious/avoidant behaviour. (Sholevar 2013)”
Therapy can help:
- Assist with the initial stress following a separation/divorce.
- Create no norms (traditions, expectations, and rules) for yourself and family members involved (i.e. children, parents).
- Assist in improving parenting skills to help children cope with the separation (for those with children).
- Reduce the rate of damaging emotional disorders.
- Explore the existence of a co-parenting relationship (if children are involved).
- Improve self-esteem and self-confidence.
